


Salt & Heroism

by twistedthingsandchocolate



Category: Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: First Kiss, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, M/M, Self-Sacrifice, Slash, Star Wars: The Last Jedi Spoilers, no rose bashing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-10
Updated: 2018-01-12
Packaged: 2019-03-03 06:59:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13335891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twistedthingsandchocolate/pseuds/twistedthingsandchocolate
Summary: He hears the telltale sound of someone removing their comlink, and he curses out loud, trying and failing to hail Finn twice before giving it up as a lost cause. Finn’s ski speeder charges ahead, and Poe can’t breathe, knowing Finn is going to die, oh Force, he’s---Poe sends a silent apology to the General, and floors it, yanking his speeder around in an arc to intercept Finn’s.





	1. In which Poe regrets his hotshot ways.

The ski speeder to his right burst into a ball of fire, a choked scream followed by static the last thing anyone heard from its pilot.

Poe’s comrades were being picked off one by one, their rickety old ski speeders not fast or close enough to avoid the AT-M6's artillery. He could feel the heat of the miniaturized Death Star cannon, see it begin to glow an ominous orange in the distance. They'd have to retreat. They couldn't destroy that thing in time, not without taking even heavier casualties. The Resistance couldn't afford that, not now.

Poe spoke into his mouthpiece, dread and bitter guilt pooling in his gut;

“They’re picking us all off. We’re not gonna make it.”

He heard a few of his fellow pilots grunt their assent. Most of them remained silent, no doubt feeling the bitter sting of failure as well. Every soldier in the Resistance was willing to die for their cause, but experience had made them all weary of pointless suicide runs. They weren’t worth it.

Only one voice spoke up through the comlink;

“Alright, making my final approach. Target in sight. Guns are hot.”

_Finn._

With a jolt, Poe realized what Finn, inexperienced but braver than most Finn, must be feeling. That frustration, the short-sighted focus on the target right in front of him, the determination to win the day at all costs…

He yanks the mic down closer to his mouth, hoping he can get through to Finn before he does something stupid.

“No, pull up!”

_Please, Finn, don’t do what I think you’re gonna do._

“What?!”

He can hear the disbelief in Finn’s voice, the betrayed conviction underneath, and if he didn’t feel guilty before, he’s definitely regretting all of the times he has ever decided to disobey a direct order from the General now. With Black Squadron at his back, he’d never considered how stressful having someone you cared about under your command, disobeying orders and endangering themselves, could be. Not fully.

The cannon’s glow grows brighter, the air surrounding it shimmering with heat.

“The cannon is charged! It’s a suicide-run! All crafts – pull away!”

He sees the others fall back out of the corner of his eyes, but Finn keeps going, flying ahead of him, stubbornly accelerating, and Poe can’t tell if it’s the adrenaline or the sudden burst of panicked frustration that is making his heart beat in his throat.

“No, I’m almost there!”

Finn’s voice is defiant, tinged with an edge of frustration, and Poe gets it, he does, but now is not the time for heroics, Force damn it.

“Retreat, Finn, that’s an order!”

He yells into the headset, and he knows, as the words leave his mouth, that they won’t make Finn change his mind. Pulling rank won’t work on a man who defied the First Order, a man looking to pay them back for their cruelty. It won’t work, just like it didn’t work on Poe. He can feel the frustration ebb and the desperation start to take over.

At this rate, Finn is going to die.

“Finn! It’s too late, don’t do this!”

He pleads instead. He can’t be weak, not now, not in the middle of a battle, but he’s realizing quickly that he can’t lose Finn either. He won’t let stupid, amazing, beautiful Finn go out like this. He’d rather have Finn with him, alive and pissed off, than on a list of dead heroes with Paige Tico and the rest of the Resistance.

He won’t let Finn get killed, not on his watch.

“No! I won’t let them win!”

Finn yells, and Poe can picture how his deep brown eyes are trained on the cannon, same as his had been on that kriffing Dreadnought. He can hear the rage in his voice, the rage of someone who had so much stolen from him by these First Order bastards, but after everything they’ve already lost today, he can’t, he can’t, _he can’t_ …

_Finn!_

“No, Finn, listen to me! We have to retreat!”

He tries again, cursing the Force and himself for ever being this reckless. Curses Finn in that moment for being every bit the man who saved a stranger from a First Order cell and fought a Sith apprentice to protect his friend on Starkiller.

_Please, Finn, turn back!_

He hears the telltale sound of someone removing their comlink, and he curses out loud, trying and failing to hail Finn twice before giving it up as a lost cause. Finn’s ski speeder charges ahead, and Poe can’t breathe, knowing Finn is going to die, oh Force, he’s---

Poe sends a silent apology to the General, and floors it, yanking his speeder around in an arc to intercept Finn’s.

_Force, let me make it in time._

The last thing he registers before the crash is Finn’s beautiful eyes meeting his, wide-open and shocked, and the heat of the cannon’s exhaust on his face.

Then all he knows is pain, and heat, and darkness.


	2. In which Finn realizes he's an idiot.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shock, awe, confusion, guilt, love – Finn’s frozen to the spot, trying to process everything he’s feeling in that moment.

No, no, no no no, this can’t be right, this can’t be happening…

Finn wrestles himself out of his wrecked speeder, nearly tripping in his haste to get to the smoking wreck, get to Poe, that stupid moof-milking---

“Poe!”

He isn’t answering.

Poe isn’t answering, just like last time, and for a moment Finn can’t breathe, can only see sand and blood, can smell the acrid smoke billowing out of a wrecked TIE-fighter, and Force, no, not again.

He’s almost to the speeder.

He runs faster.

“Poe?!”

He calls, skidding over a broken wing. He can see Poe now, slumped forward in the cockpit. Finn can’t tell if he’s breathing, and his heart’s breaking, because no, not Poe, not brave, fantastic, heroic Poe Dameron.

He’d been prepared to die sticking it to the First Order. He’d been okay with it, knowing in his gut that it’d help Poe and the others win the day, that his sacrifice would make the First Order regret ever messing with him. That he’d die the hero Poe and Rey and Rose had thought he was.

He doesn’t understand why Poe would do this. They could’ve won, but now---

“POE?!”

He can’t hold the fear out of his voice, can’t hold back the desperate need to feel Poe’s pulse and know he isn’t dead, because he can’t lose him, can’t stand having another squadmate’s blood on his conscience, he can’t, he can’t, _he can’t_ \---

He pushes Poe back into the seat with damnably trembling hands, one going to Poe’s pulse even as the man lets out a weak cough and stirs, the other coming up to hold Poe’s head steady, cupping the man’s stubby, soot-covered cheek.

Poe’s eyes slowly rise to meet Finn’s, and the little unguarded smile he sends Finn makes Finn want to check the nerfherder for a concussion.

“Why did you do that, Poe? Huh? I was almost there!”

He shouts, half-wanting to know the answer, half-desperate to get the pilot out of that damned harness so he could get them both to safety, and---

Poe’s hand cups Finn’s cheek, making the breath freeze in Finn’s lungs. The look on Poe’s face is soft, fond, _pained_. A thousand questions run through Finn’s mind, first of which is what he’d done to earn that fondness when he wasn’t anything special, when he’d taken so long to stop being a coward, when he’d tries to abandon Poe in the first place...

He voices none of these thoughts, as Poe’s thumb caresses his cheek once, twice.

“I owed you one, buddy.”

Poe’s voice is scratchy, weak, but his gaze is intense and his hand is warm, warmer than the cannon’s scorching heat. Finn couldn’t stop staring into Poe’s eyes if he tried.

He’s wrong. Poe doesn’t owe him anything.

He gave Finn a name, a chance, a friendship he’d never thought he’d have. Poe had given him someone to rely on, someone he could trust to be right behind him no matter what obstacles faced them. Finn would gladly have given it all up to give Poe a win against the First Order.

Finn’s about to voice all of this, when Poe’s lips meet his. The harness and the angle make it awkward, but it’s Finn’s first kiss, and before he can even properly register it’s happening and respond, Poe is falling back into the ruined cockpit chair, coughing from the sudden movement.

Shock, awe, confusion, guilt, love – Finn’s frozen to the spot, trying to process everything he’s feeling in that moment.

Behind them, the cannon goes off, damaging their meager defenses and denting the Gate, but Finn barely notices. It’s nothing compared to the explosion of warmth in his gut, in his chest, in his cheeks.

Poe’s hand finds his where it’s clutching the front of his harness.

"It isn't about winning over the people you hate... it's about making a better future for the people you love. That’s how we’ll know we’ve won."

He says it so earnestly, so quietly, like it’s a revelation even to himself. Poe’s hand gives his own a squeeze. Then his eyes flutter and slip shut. Poe’s hand loosens its grip and falls to his lap, as the pilot falls unconscious.

"Poe? Poe!”

Finn’s finds the pilot’s pulse again – it’s there. A little slower, but still there. Finn quickly gets to work and finally manages to get that damned harness off. He needs to get Poe back to the base, back to a medic. He’s not losing him, not now, not with so much left unsaid between them.

He drags the pilot out of the cockpit, fashions a makeshift gurney out of the wreckage, and sets out for the base.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huh, I'm actually pretty proud of this part.
> 
> Thank you to the lovely people, who've commented! You're awesome. And thank you to the people, who've kudos'd and bookmarked as well. Knowing people enjoyed reading my stuff so far makes me really happy. <3
> 
> Now, I'm gonna go finish writing Part 3. Shouldn't take more than a few days to a week, tops. As always, any engagement is appreciated. Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> So, yeah, I really loved that scene on Crait, but wasn't really feeling Rose being a part of it. I love that girl to death, but Rian & Disney really should've let her have a spin-off comic and not tried to cram in another lead in a trilogy that's already got no room as it is. Rose deserved better than that, as did Finn, Poe, and Rey.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this, and thank you to Kirby Krackle for that wonderful Stormpilot song of his. If there was a #Mood to go with this fic, it's that.
> 
> Constructive criticism is appreciated, as is bookmarks and kudos. I still hate the way this chapter starts, for an example. Might edit that at a later date.


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